Perhaps you (or someone you know) have been part of a work team or a sports team that was a disaster – because of the lack of good communication. So what does communication have to do with a winning team, or a successful work team? Everything.
Every team works better when everyone is feeling good about their contribution and the relationships they have with the other team members. A team that has good rapport* has a good vibe. That good vibe translates into good team spirit and energy. How to stay in rapport with all team members is the secret. Avoiding breaking rapport with others is the key.
*rap·port /raˈpôr/ (noun)
A close and harmonious relationship in which the people or groups concerned understand each other’s feelings or ideas and communicate well.
Consider this: It could take a few minutes to a couple of hours to build rapport with someone. It could take a minute to break that rapport. It could take forever to repair it. So, learning what breaks rapport is key to creating and maintaining healthy, high-performance, good-vibe work and sports teams.
Build and Maintain Good Connection With Others
Because there are 4 main communication/learning styles, it increases the probability that the person you are communicating with has a different style than yours—and this is often the cause of broken rapport. The 4 styles are: Visual, Auditory, Kinesthetic (feelers), and Digital (thinkers).
Each communication style has characteristics unique to that style, which means the other 3 styles have less interest in some of those characteristics. For example, the Visual style communicator likes to see things when being taught, and the auditory style only needs to hear when being taught. So, conflict will occur when the visual team member is only getting instructions in an auditory way. Frustration occurs, rapport gets broken and now this team player’s negativity is affecting team results.
Here is a summary of the 4 styles and the words each style uses. To build the best rapport with someone, listen for the words they commonly use (see table below) and use those words when communicating back to them. Be a better, more well-rounded communicator by using words that appeal to each style. In a team environment, using words that appeal to all styles will help ensure that all 4 styles are getting your message.Commonly Used Words:
Look, Appear, View, Big Picture, See, Imagine
Hear, Sounds Like, Talk, Tell Me, Resonate, Ideas
Feel, Touch, Comfortable, Grasp, Get a Handle, Fit, Connect
Think, Thoughts, Order, Sequence, Makes Sense
Use this quick guide above to help you become familiar with commonly used words for each style. When you understand the style of others, you can adjust the words you use, so you can stay in rapport with whomever you are talking to.
If your communication is working well with someone, you don’t need to do anything to fix it. (This is usually the case when that person has the same style as yours, hence, the good connection).
When you feel or think that your communication with someone is not going well, then it’s time for you to fix it. Listen for the words they use that fit their style (as above), and try to match their words—you will quickly see and experience instant, positive results.
Here is another guide you can you use to understand more about others’ styles:How they may end an email or telephone conversation:
See you later
Thanks for the chat. Chat later.
Nice to connect. Hugs. Take care.
Bye (or just hang up, when ending phone conversation)
Harmonious teams create dynamic team results. Practice today, listening to others’ communication styles and become a well-balanced communicator.
To learn what your most dominant and less dominate communication style is, complete the online assessment at: www.LawofConnectionBook.com
About Michael Losier
Michael Losier (Low-zee-eh) lives in beautiful Victoria, BC, on Canada’s West Coast. He is the author of the best-selling book Law of Attraction: The Science of Attracting More of What You Want and Less of What You Don’t, and two other best-selling books, Law of Connection and Your Life's Purpose.
Michael caught the attention of Oprah Winfrey, who interviewed him four times on her Soul Series™ radio show on Sirius/XM satellite radio. Michael went on to enjoy a year-long run hosting his own radio show on Oprah & Friends™ Radio.
Michael is a world-class trainer who has taught Law of Attraction in 17 countries. His book, Law of Attraction, has sold over 3 million copies in 37 languages. He has certified 475 trainers with his Certified Law of Attraction Facilitator program in 14 countries.
You can visit Michael's website for info on his books: www.MichaelLosier.com